Wednesday, April 04, 2007

My StepMother is Dead Redux

Lots of personal family stuff going on in my life right now. My father, after 15 years, has decided that he wants a relationship again. Of course he doesn't want all the nasty stuff that goes along with that, like apologies and owning up to his wrongs. I won't go into everything that happened right now, but suffice it to say that he screwed up way beyond anything that any parent is allowed to screw up. My step-mother had the bigger part in all of it. She was the most evil person I have ever known. Her vindictiveness and my father's greed tore the family apart. I found out last night that on her death bed she was worried for her soul, as well she should have been. I swear I laughed harder than I have in a long time over that one. It's something she should have thought of before going around screwing people for fun and profit. Anyway, I thought I would repost the picture of the cake I baked in celebration of her passing last year.

Ding Dong The Witch Is Dead!

We watched the Wizard of Oz and ate this cake.
I don't know if it's possible to ever forgive my father, but I certainly won't be forgetting and moving on as he would like.

[Update: I feel so much better now. Getting that off my chest this morning, and staying angry for the past couple of days helped my brain get stuff straight in my head. So did some talks with other family members. We are a happy family without him in it. It's sad, for sure, but that was his choice many years ago, and throughout the past 15 years he has had many chances to decide otherwise, he chose greed and power above his family. You can't take that back and make everyone forget how horribly you treated them.
Maybe one of these days I'll fill you all in on the details, I'm sure you're dying to know. Aaron says this could all be a Lifetime Original Movie and that I should write a memoir, or go to Oprah. All I want is for it to be over once and for all so I can move on with my life. Maybe I will write about it one day, but I'll wait for for my Father to be gone before then; I don't want him profiting even further from my pain. Anyway, thanks internets for letting me vent today]


Larry Keiler said...

Ahh, Nancy, obviously I don't know what's all involved in your grievance. All I can say is, I think it's regrettable, and hope with time it can be resolved since anger, even righteous anger, is not a pleasant feeling. Your stepmother's dead, so she doesn't feel the effects of it. Only you do.

My partner, (who I call Suzy Homemaker on Mental Blog) used to do this to me: when I was angry about something, she would say, "Do you want to talk about it, or would you rather just stay angry for a while?" Pointing out, of course, that anger is a choice. Sometimes my answer was, "Yes, I want to stay angry."

Nancy said...

Hi Larry,
Thanks for the comment! :)
I just really needed to get that of my chest and out there this morning. I guess it's my way of releasing my anger, without turning to the dark side. ;)