Recently Reading, Watching, Listening...

The month of February was a tough one for me. I've been busy with school and work and trying to make something of my life. I've been depressed and started therapy. So not much reading, watching, and listening has been done. Here's a short list for the month of February:

Books:

1. Life's A Bitch and Then You Change Careers by Andrea Kay
2. Morning Has Broken by Emme and Phillip Aronson

Movies:

1. Babylon 5 (season 5)
2. Firefly

Music:

95.7 Max FM

That is pretty much it for February. Hopefull March is better to me, though it's not getting off to a good start....

Blog Template

I got a comment a couple days ago that was more a question than comment. I decided not to accept the comment, but instead just post about it so that I can answer as best I can for more than one person. I know from experience how frustrating it is to work with these templates. I'll try my best to answer the question. Essentially she wanted to know how I got my template posted. If I were to try to do the same thing again right now, I would have to start from scratch. I just spent the past 3 hours trying to figure out how to post my own template (as you can see it hasn't worked yet). I am great with the design aspect; put me in front of PhotoShop or PaintShop Pro, and I'll come up with some beautiful designs; I can even make a nice web site, but throw all those Blogger tags in and my brain goes dead. Really what you have to do, once you have your new template code, is to read through your current code to see where to copy and paste the code into. That is how I work it, just reading the code and copy and pasting where appropriate; also lots of previewing until I get it right.
She also wanted to know if putting up a new template would erase pictures and whatnot already on the blog. Well, if the picture is part of a post, in the main area, no; but you will want to save all your links and other postings from the nav bar, this will be erased and you will have to copy and paste what you want there again. The best thing to do is read the help files on the Blogger Dashboard. Hopefully this was helpful in some way.

In other news: My vacation is almost over. It started out great. I got to help my sis move into her new place and got to spend some great quality time with her and my nieces. It was a really nice weekend, and I am so happy to have her living so much closer. I've spent the past few days putting some order into my own place. Aaron and I have so much stuff in our little one bedroom apartment, it feels very congested and stifling. I've managed to keep the livingroom and kitchen clean for two whole days in a row, lol. We'll see what happens when I am back to the daily grind of work and school. I have not done much else. I feel like I need another week or two. I've been watching a lot of Digital Life TV with Aaron; cool show, I love Robert and Patrick. I still miss Tech TV.
What I have gathered from my week off from work is that I really love being at home, a lot. I love having the time to keep the place in order, I love having the time to myself, I love being free to do what I want when I want. If I could figure out how to go back to part-time work while supplementing my income with something online, I'd be a happy camper. First I'll have to figure out that CSS stuff.

Good Days Are Nice Surprises

When most everyday is an uphill battle; when just getting out of bed and going about your day is a huge struggle, and everyday just plain sucks; it feels like a nice surprise when you have a good day. I had a good day today. I had a good day at work today. Now, I will go knock on wood and hope that the rest of my day goes as well.

Back to Work

Christmas and New Years are over; my daughter is on her way back to her dad's; my sick time off from work is over; and now it's time to go back to work. I am filled with dread. I'm still sick and I didn't get the "time alone" I needed to re-energize. I still hate my job and I just can't figure out how to get over it and move on. Maybe this will be the year I finally make the big changes in my life that I keep putting off; we'll see.

Feeling Better

SO I actually ended up going out for my birthday. Aaron convinced me that I should get out and see a movie (even though that is inside still) I had lunch at Applebee's, fish-n-chips, then we went to Ikea, where Aaron bought me a little table for my laptop that I can use while sitting in my chair. After food and shopping, we went to see Narnia. Then I came home and got to work on homework that I forgot was due today.

The network connection between my laptop and the main computer keeps going out. I think something is screwed up on my end of the connection (what's new, haha). It's going to drive me crazy.

It's back to work tomorrow (do I have to?) and then on Monday my daughter will be here for Christmas.

Right now all I can think about is how great it would be if I didn't ever have to go back to work again. I wish I lived in a world where the perfect job for me would just happen. Ah, but no such luck. I'm 36 years old now and I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. If only I could make a decent living knitting scarves and playing web designer. I wish I had time to devote to playing with web sites again. I'd love to get started in making templates for my blog. I don't have the time or energy at the moment. In fact I should be in bed right now, it's almost 2 am.

Birthday blahs

Well, today is my birthday. I had a little to drink last night and slept in a little late today; I'm feeling slightly hung-over.
I don't know what I want to do today. Aaron wants to take me to the city. The logical part of me says I need to stay home on this last day off before my class ends and finish my paper.

Frustration

I really wish I would get in here more often to update. I am so stressed out and tired and just feel like giving up on everything. Work sucks to the point that I am leaving everyday crying from frustration. I don't know what to do or where to go. I'm going to spend the afternoon before work getting school work done and then updating my resume and getting it out there asap. I so wanted to put in my two weeks today. In fact I want to everyday, but the only thing stopping me is that I have bills to pay and no savings. This job is slowly killing me and I just can't take it anymore. I'm way too smart to be wasting my time in retail, it's not worth the health problems it's putting me through and, again, it's frustrating. There's got to be an easier way.

About that not driving thing...

So, things at work are not great. I don't want to join the group of people who have been fired for blogging about work so I can't say much; I'll leave it at work sucks right now, and I don't see it getting any better anytime soon. What is keeping me from moving on to bigger and better things? I don't drive. This weekend I got a big push in the direction of I have to start driving or my life will suck forever! So, I have an appointment today to get my permit (yet again). Hopefully this time I can get through my fear and just do it.

Better and Better

Things have been getting better. I've started getting my apartment cleaned out. We have so much stuff and no room for anything; it's just created a constant mess. The messiness creates an atmosphere of frustration and anxiety, which in turn makes me tired and cranky and depressed. So I've spent the past week going through things and getting rid of things. I threw out 6 bags of trash, most of it shredded paper, and got about 5 or 6 boxes cleared out of the bedroom. We still have a long way to go, but it's a start. I am feeling lighter today and less frenetic. I'm trying to decide on a posting schedule that I can stick to so I am updating more often. Also, I'm trying to decide if I should just focus on one or two topics here. My passions are video games and the internet and I am really getting into knitting. I am a 30 something year old female who loves video games and knits; are there that many of us out there? I have no clue.
Tonight I'll be eating pizza and watching the new Star Wars DVD that was just released. I'm not overwhelmingly excited about Star Wars, but I get to spend time with Aaron. :)

Good times

I had a really nice day yesterday. Usually I have to walk to work, it takes 20 minutes, and I usually suffer from a panic attack along the way. I don't live in a horrible neighborhood, but there are enough wierdos out there to keep me on my toes. So, by the time I get to work I am exhausted. Yesterday I had my fiance drop me off on his way to work, so I got to work a couple hours early, but I was relaxed and calm and felt good. Did I forget to mention that I don't drive? Yes, I am a thirty something woman who lives in an urban area and doesn't drive. Why anyone would want to drive here is beyond me. There is a constant stream of debris at the intersection of my apartment complex, from all those crazy drivers running into eachother. Anyway, my day at work started out calm and relaxed, and remained that way for the rest of the day. I was afraid to breath a sigh of relief for fear that the craziness would commence the minute I did, but no craziness ever commenced.

I'm hoping today will be a quiet day as well, even though I have to walk to work today.

I started reading Spook by Mary Roach today. I read Stiff last year; great book. Stiff helped me decide what I wanted done with me when I finally go; that would be to let the person who has to deal with me do what they want. :) Spook looks equally as interesting. So far I'm just into the first chapter on reincarnation, but have had more than a few laughs.
Well, off to do homework, and getting ready for an exciting walk to work.

P.S. I turned comments back on. :)